President Trump is rumoured to be considering unleashing Elon Musk's DOGE on the Ukraine.
A spokesperson explained:
The USA has spent some $350 billion on Ukraine and President Zelensky claims he does not know where half of it went.
Time to unleash the Kraken - DOGE!
DOGE will be tasked with a line-by-line audit of all the Ukraine's oligarchs, starting with their president, to verfiy where their money came from and where it went.
Any savings DOGE can recover will be paid back to the American taxpayer in the form of a new DOGE Divi (dividend).
The Donbass Divi will be paid in the form of special 'share-redemption' stamps that can be used to support the US stock market by purchasing shares in leading companies such as Tesla, SpaceX, The Boring Company and anything else owned by Elon Musk. Bonus!