FNN has learned that St Oggs cathedral now offers 'holy week' retreats for £950, for those who prefer a staycation in bankrupt Britain.
The retreat offers a number of special attractions such as:
- Unlimited sherry with the Bishop and the Archdeacon
- A unique selfie of you wearing the 13th century cloak of St Ogg
- Tea with the Dean and his wife
- A midnight vigil to catch a glimpse of the ghost of St Oggs
These holy weeks are expected to be very popular so book now!
Bill "Bendover" Heslop, a former St Oggs choirboy, commented:
I remember my days behind the altar at St Oggs with great fondness. I'm still a sucker for anyone in a cassock.
Hey Muriel! fetch me a tinnie. I'm parched.