University Challenged

Flagship show to be revamped

Due to the fact that contestants on the BBC's flagship "boffin" show, University Challenge, are proving universally challenged in their ability to answer the questions correctly, the show is to be given a makeover.

The current host will be replaced by an AI, that takes the physical form of the head alien from Mars Attacks, who will pose a bunch of spur of the moment questions, all in his bizarre alien language, that reflect the key issues of the day.

But the real innovation is that the possible answers will be presented on a large, illuminated board as a four-option multiple choice.

For example, the top university talent could be asked: Why was Nigel Farage De-Banked?

  1. Due to insufficient funds
  2. Due to his support for Brexit
  3. Due to his non-inclusive views
  4. All of the above

This gives the contestants a 25% chance of getting the answer right as opposed to 0% now.

Australian PhD, Dr. Bill "Bamber" Heslop told FNN:

I welcome the introduction of an AI to run the show which lately has become moribund - that means fucked to you pommie bastards.

Just don't mess with the theme tune: Ba-rim-bum-doodly-bip-a-doodly-bim-bippidee-bippie-doo...

Hey Muriel! Fetch me a tinnie. I'm parched.

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