Lurpak Lockdown

Empty shelves gone mad

Reports that basic foodstuffs are being put into lockdown by UK supermarkets is a further sign that empty shelves are the new normal in cost-of-living crisis UK.

FNN has learned that:

  • Lurpak butter is being sold in protective kevlar mesh nets
  • Eggs are being sold in lockable egg boxes and restricted to two cartons per shopper
  • Sunflower oil can only be bought in 'shots' from what look like alcohol dispensers
  • Pork pies will only be sold in slices (like cakes) with a maximum of one teaspoon of Branston pickle as a relish per slice

Greggs has also announced that all purchases of their classic Bacon Roll will be logged to make sure that shoppers do not exceed their daily allowance of 10 rolls and 5 packets of sauce.

 

 

Interesting?

Get FNN by email

New posts straight to your inbox. Subscribers also see the AI context on each post, such as the mainstream-media view and an editorial comment, and can search and filter the whole archive. It's free, and you can unsubscribe at any time.