Sky News reports:
Spectator theatre critic boasts of using prostitute after arousal at lecturing professor's "blonde hair"
Lloyd Evans, a theatre critic for The Spectator, said he was "desperate" to speak to "beautiful historian" Professor Lea Ypi after she gave a lecture at Darwin College, but was unable to and visited a prostitute for an "already arranged social rendezvous".
A new 'Happy Ending' lecture series is rumoured to be under consideration by Cambridge University that will feature their most attractive lecturers in provocative clothing lecturing on obscure topics.
Lecture attendees will be offered post-lecture sessions such as 'a sauna bath' in order to ensure their intellectual needs can be fully satisfied.
A spokesperson explained:
Here at the University we understand how exciting and stimulating lectures on topics such as political philosophy can be.
Especially if you haven't knocked one out recently.
So we are offering this new Happy Ending lecture series as a means to satisfy those with both a thirst for knowledge and a bod for sin (cf. Working Girl (1988)) through our new partnership with selected OnlyFans models (who must have a PhD) and a popular local massage parlour (Rubdown Rendevous).
The University may also consider offering a 'private consultation' service for a fee (£5000) for those who really need to discuss something specific directly with the lecturer.