In one of his last acts as President, Joe Biden has awarded Pope Francis the Presidential Medal of Freedom (with Distinction) for his efforts to embrace the LGBTQ+ agenda and stamp out pedophilia in the Catholic church.
Prior to awarding the medal, Biden playfully headbutted the Pope after he realised the pontiff had no hair he could sniff or stroke.
A spokesperson explained:
As President, Joe Biden hopes that the award of this medal of honour, which could be defined as a kind of 'indulgence' purchased by the US government to forgive him for his many sins in office, will ensure he enters the pearly gates without having to ascend any kind of staircase.
During Biden's visit, the Vatican proudly flew the Rainbow flag and burned an effigy of Donald Trump, which was the first time orange smoke has been seen coming out of the Vatican chimney.