As The Telegraph reports, another 'D' word came to the fore recently when 'A Church of England school teacher told a pupil she was “despicable” after she refused to accept that her classmate identified as a cat'.
The 'despicable' 13 year-old pupil, clearly also a 'deplorable' and probably a Trump and Brexit supporter told her teacher:
If they want to identify as a cat or something then they are genuinely unwell – crazy
Apparently she got her pronouns right but failed to notice that the other pupil, who was barking and sniffing bottoms, was in fact identifying as a dog.
This is fast becoming a problem in schools as children now self-identify as different entities from week to week. All schools are now being encouraged to hire an Identification Counsellor to help children who have lost their identity grounding.
Australian identity expert Bill "The Billabong Bender" Heslop told FNN:
You can soon tell if this cat identification is genuine or not. Sit her in a litter box with a can of Whiskas and see if she coughs up a hairball.
Hey Muriel fetch me a tinnie! I'm parched.