The University of Cambridge has decided to cancel Anglo Saxons from their English history courses arguing that these Northern Europeans that crossed the channel on boats were merely illegal immigrants being people trafficked into England.
A spokesperson for the renamed University of Cambridge Department of Norse and Celtic studies told FNN:
The Anglo-Saxons were nothing more than a meaningless interlude in English history between the Italians (i.e. the Romans), the Scandinavians (i.e. the Vikings) and the French (i.e. the Normans).
Their literature and artefacts mean little in comparison to Roman bum-wiping sponges on a stick, Viking tattoos and Norman tapestry weaving skills.
So we've decided to cancel them from our national history to ensure that England is understood to be a multi-cultural nation of Europeans, that does not include the barbarian Angles, Saxons and as my cousin Vinny would put it... 'Jutes'.