Following the recent lawsuit against Subway for selling tuna sandwiches that are allegedly "devoid of tuna", FNN has learned that many other sandwich bars and fast food chains are set to be sued for much the same reason including:
- burger bars for selling burgers made from solidified Bovril
- kebab shops for selling doners made from recycled car tires
- chicken shops for selling fried chicken composed of compressed mechanically separated chicken
- chippies selling battered fish that is in fact tripe
A spokesperson for the Food Standards Agency (FSA) told FNN:
Most of us have no idea what the goo is in much of the takeaway food that has entered the food chain. And don't get me started on what is used to fill certain pies and pastys. Judging by the smell, you'd think some of these pie factories were sewage works.
EU spokesperson Ursula von Richthofen commented.
We can assure all EU citizens that our currywursts are packed with nutritional goodness and full of healthy fibre. That's why they are guaranteed to make you fart. Vorsprung durch Teknik!