FNN can exclusively reveal that the UK government has signed up for a new AI tool called 'Policy Pump'.
A spokesperson explains:
Policy Pump is a new AI tool developed in the North that generates a 'policy for change' every day.
It's kinda like those AI tools that generate a new blog post every day so you don't have to be bothered writing one yourself.
So every day there's something new for the media to chew on to prevent them focusing on what is actually being done.
It's genius and it's from up North. Bonus!
All you have to do is turn the crank and the policy pump churns out a policy.
A bit like the Wurzels' 'Thrashing Machine'.
Unfortunately Policy Pump occasionally hallucinates, like many AI tools.
FNN has discovered that some of the policies suggested were a little out there:
- forget drilling in the North Sea and just buy Russian energy
- declare war on the USA to help world peace
- reduce VAT on pork pies by 20%
- start driving on the right
- establish a Tripe marketing board to promote the dish
But at least with Policy Pump automatically generating policies, the Government can focus on things that matter like the 'summer of sex'.
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/mp-samantha-niblett-labour-summer-b2957556.html